Why Dan and Andrea Hurley and We Two Aren't Going to Hollywood

We were oblivious, my wife Jen and I, while we were in Los Angeles last week that UConn Coach Dan Hurley was there too, being wooed by the Los Angeles Lakers.

How could we not know? Well, at home we’re news junkies; when we’re on the road, on vacation, we try to tune everything out.

We were in L.A. to visit our two daughters, who moved there in 2016, quickly grew to love it and quite likely will never leave.

We’re proud and happy they’ve found fulfillment. But it breaks our hearts to be 3,000 miles apart.

They want us to move there. Every time we visit, usually twice a year, we ponder this possibility.

But every time we come back to good old New Haven, Connecticut, our home for decades, we’re convinced L.A. would not be a good fit for us.

Dan Hurley ultimately made the same decision, to the great relief of UConn Husky fans. They love the guy and hope next year he can lead the team to a third straight national championship.

A few hours after we woke up Monday of this week, still dealing with jet lag, Hurley announced: “I’m stayin.’” I think that was the first we’d heard he had even considered leaving. But we joined in the statewide euphoria. We’re Husky fans.

There are striking similarities in the thinking of the Hurleys and the Beach-(Jennifer) Kaylins. Andrea Hurley is a self-proclaimed “Jersey girl” who met Dan while they were students at Seton Hall. Dan’s parents still live in New Jersey. Dan and Andrea have a home on the Jersey shore. My wife and I are not natives to New Haven; I grew up in Mount Kisco, N.Y., she in Old Lyme, about 40 minutes east of New Haven. But we met in New Haven and we love our adopted hometown and our neighborhood. Every summer we rent a beach cottage in Madison. Although the Hurleys grew up in New Jersey, they have become embedded in Storrs, CT., where UConn sits. Hurley has coached there for six years.

When the news broke on ESPN Thursday morning of last week that Hurley was considering the Lakers head coach job and would fly to L.A. to discuss it with the Lakers hierarchy, there was great anguish in Huskyland. That angst would not dissipate until Monday afternoon of this week. Connecticut’s newspapers, especially the Hartford Courant and New Haven Register, were going nuts with breathless front page stories, following Hurley’s every move as he tried to make up his mind.

Would he stay or would he go?

Everybody was watching for clues. Dan and Andrea made it back east last Saturday night to go to a Billy Joel concert at Madison Square Garden. A video was posted showing the Hurleys there with Husky assistant coach Luke Murray. The video included Joel singing Bruce Springsteen’s anthem “Born to Run,” which is loaded with Jersey references. Was this a hint that the Hurleys were staying on the East Coast?

“The songs were crazy,” Hurley said later. “The lyrics were messing with my head.”

Like, say, “Goodbye to Hollywood”? You can listen to that song and realize why you want to stay true to your roots: “So many faces in and out of my life; some will last, some will just be now and then. Life is a series of hellos and goodbyes…”

Still they hadn’t decided! But there’s some pretty good evidence Andrea was driving this train. Dan told reporters that when he told her about the Lakers offer, “She was angry. Anger turned to tears. She wasn’t happy about it. We all love it here. When you love it and you’re so happy, you don’t want that type of disruption.”

On Sunday, Hurley has reported, they had some more time to talk about it. “You’re able to follow your heart, which is here, and your brain, which is here.”

He said this was an opportunity to “test your value system and the things that are important to you.”

Finally, on Sunday night, Dan and Andrea agreed to simultaneously text each other on whether to stay or go. Both typed “stay.” They repeated the test Monday morning. Same result.

He turned down a six-year $70 million deal to coach the Lakers, whose team includes superstars such as LeBron James. But soon Hurley will get a raise at UConn: $50 million for six years.

Nobody is offering us $70 million to move to L.A. But money isn’t a key factor in our thinking. There are other things at play. For one thing: I hate driving on highways! I hate being stuck in traffic! Does that sound like a good fit?

Last weekend, while enduring a never-ending series of “freeways” and traffic tie-ups in a rental car, I kept singing that Jerry Jeff Walker song (written by Guy Clark): “If I can just get off of this L.A. freeway without gettin’ killed or caught…”

Sure, people complain about the traffic on I-95 in Connecticut. Try those California highways! I dare you. I felt lucky we made it back here alive. I always feel that way upon our return.

I know, I know — the weather out there is wonderful. The terrain is beautifully amazing: those mountains, that coastline. I’ve listened to the Randy Newman song “I Love L.A.” (“Looks like another perfect day.”) But we’ve got our four seasons, we’ve got some mountains and shoreline too. (It’s not shared enough with the public but that’s a whole different topic for another day.)

Who knows, maybe one day my wife and I will change our minds and head west. People tell us: “Oh, just you wait ‘til you have grandkids! That changes everything.”

But for now, like Dan and Andrea Hurley, we’re stayin’ in Connecticut.